I WIN!
Okay, wow was this a hassle, but more of a server set-up I didn’t complete. I am using Ubuntu 11.4. I think it’s 4.. Anyways, open up your command line, PuTTY is what I use to remotely run it..
Anyways, first things first, make sure mod_rewrite is on. It was off for me.
Steps: For me, I log into a user, so I have to cd ../../ to get to the base. Type ls to make sure you’re in the directory with /var and /etc.
Run this command to enable mod_rewrite:
sudo a2enmod rewrite
Restart Apache:
sudo /etc/init.d/apache2 reload
(I think here I restarted the whole server instead of just apache… had to walk to the box.. messed something up.. lol)
Now, The main problem lies within the rules of allowing .htaccess override.
We’ll need to edit a file:
sudo nano /etc/apache2/sites-available/default
I had to edit this in two spots.
<VirtualHost *:80>
ServerAdmin webmaster@localhost
DocumentRoot /var/www
<Directory >
Options FollowSymLinks
AllowOverride All
</Directory>
<Directory /var/www>
Options Indexes FollowSymLinks MultiViews
AllowOverride All
Order allow,deny
allow from all
</Directory>
Where it is bold, it says None, change it to All. It was the second one that did it, but I already changed the first one, so it’s staying at All. lol
If you’re not familiar with Nano, press Ctrl-X to exit, Y to save.
Restart apache again with the command above, and it works! 
:):)
My file structure: http://regal/sebserver htacc.ess was in the sebserver folder.
.htaccess:
RewriteEngine On
RewriteBase /sebserver/
RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} !-f
RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} !-d
RewriteRule ^(.*)$ index.php/$1 [L]
If this does not work, let me know 